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It is not uncommon to see that women nod their head as an indication that they are paying attention. It may be a dangerous gesture as men may leave the conversation thinking that the nod meant an agreement. However, they may be shocked to discover later that the woman did not agree at all, all she did was indicate that she had been listening. The women interpret the habits of men differently. Often the man may sit silently, not nodding or anything and his body are in neutral body language to indicate that they have been listening. However, the woman will just assume that the man is bored or even worse, that they are not listening at all. It could also occur to the woman that the man does not understand what they are saying. In the event this happens, she may feel obliged to dwell in unnecessary emphasis and may end up boring the man in the process. If not so, the woman may feel uncomfortable at the neutrality of the man’s body language.
Repetitions made by a woman are often than not interpreted by the men as mere insecurities. Men often end up claiming that a woman talks too much, and may suggest that she is not assertive enough or isn’t as confident as a leader ought to be. In order to create relationship and connection, the women are likely to use more direct eye conduct in conversations, and may end up creating the impression that they are a challenge to the power or positions that the men hold. It is also common among women that they will approach a man from the front while a man often approach from the side at an angle. This is often the style in which they sit or stand when talking to others. The men will interpret the face to face as too personal or even aggressive and women will interpret the talking side to side as to mean that he is not being upfront or that he is not telling her everything.
Basically, women desire intimacy in conversation. In so many ways this helps them to feel connected to others and also understand that they are not taken for granted in return. Men are not like that at all, because they desire to give information while remaining independent of the other party. It is easier for a man to make things personal and hence they are wired to avoid this eventual outcome. Women, though, as much as they open up so easily and require that the same be returned, do not really take personal even though are more intimate.
When it comes to talking, women are users of many words that are meant to express even more feelings. However, men are known to use few words, and they also express fewer feelings this way. Simply said, they don’t tend to be very sentimental like their female counterparts.
Women have also been wired in such a way that they tend to avoid the appearance of superiority in communication. This critically intimidates men and is best avoided even if it doesn’t mean that she does not mean to make them feel intimidated at all. Men are actually comfortable telling others what to do and appearing superior come to them as something of a natural trait. As I noted above, women are more adept to adopting a consensus before they make decisions. Men, at the same time, want to get straight to the bottom line and choosing without consulting is not uncommon among them. Finally while men communicate to solve problems and show their expertise, the women value communication for the fact that it helps in building relationships.
Different communication styles between men and women do not come about when they are all grown up and working. The influences that cause these differences begin very early in life. As small children the boys are told that they are made of ‘snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails’ while the nursery rhyme indicates that girls are ‘made of sugar and spice, and all things nice.’ This is the mentality that builds in all of us and the more we grow, it solidifies and eventually defines on how we relate and communicate. Society therefore plays a big part in shaping how we behave and how we relate and communicate.
However, these differences are also the greatest sources of stereotypes. Often men are labeled and seekers of superiority whilst the women are seen as meek. This is the reason why if a woman is seen to be very serious and demanding of superiority, they are referred as being very masculine. On the other hand a soft man who seeks opinion at every opportunity, who waits long before they reach a decision and also bows to the wills of women is not seen as a total man. Many are the times that men and women see the differences between each other. The bad thing about this is that they use these differences to make each other feel that they are right and the other is wrong. The differences between men and women should be used to appreciate each other and to build a strong society that appreciates that we are both different and deserve to be what we are.